[Caligula] I had a terrifying experience with a dominatrix chick and Depends..I will never fully recover from that incident

[BoobiePatutti] Farscape is a strong drug.
[BoobiePatutti] It lures you into it's web.
[GypsyJr] mmmmhmmm that's good 'Scape
[BoobiePatutti] And once it has you....you only fall deaper.
[BoobiePatutti] "Addicted to Farscape. Drugs would be cheaper."
[Dainichi] "Addicted to Farscape. Hands only shake during the hiatius."

[ChiDoll] Hyper *thwack* what'd the test url?
[HyperKinetic] Let me go get it...
[Eryn Tzun] so you *thwack* the Hyper and URL's come out?
[HyperKinetic] And dunnae thwack me. You're... OW!
[ChiDoll] exactly, Eryn! ;)
* HyperKinetic glares at Tzun and Chi
[Eryn Tzun] *thwack's* the Hyper some more just for fun
* HyperKinetic dodges the thwack... like Blade :P
[Eryn Tzun] If we do this enough will candy come out his arse?

[ladarumbadiddy] Java will violate you, if you turn away
[Mote] And it doesnt even stay for breakfast in the morning, and as far as cuddling after using Java? forget it!
[ladarumbadiddy] Mirc scares me like a monkey on your back that screams "Pickles, Bear, Pickles, crack and bear"

[ladarumbadiddy] if you see un-doctored photos and videos of Bill Gates, he has horns and a pitchfork, and on his forehead, a tattoo that reads "Microsoft 666"
[ladarumbadiddy] Seriously...
[Mote] Im glad I havent got that version of windows yet
[Mote] Windows 666

[PhRoSt] i say all kinds o stuff like man, yo, dude, homie, proper, hella, sweet, shibbey
[Mote] I dont know what half that means
[Mote] well ok I know all of it but hella and shibby
[Mote] I thought people stabbed other prisoners with shibbeys
[ladarumbadiddy] no thats a penis mote...

[ladarumbadiddy] "thats hella shibbey dogg, yo what a sweet ride ya got there my homie, man thats one sweet ho there, dude you know it.."
[Mote] Translation, "I love the car."

*** Lyme has quit IRC ((signed off))
[Dainichi] Er.
[Dainichi] Lyme go bada boom.
[BoobiePatutti] Ack!!
[BoobiePatutti] Lyme!!!! Come back!!!!
[BoobiePatutti] We need our GOD
[falkin42] now godless, the pack runs in cahos
[BoobiePatutti] We are LOST without your green WISDOM and GUIDENCE and PORN
[ChiDoll] O_o what will we do without god? we cannot exist! *snerk*
* BoobiePatutti throws crackskittle around and yells PANTS hopelessly
* Dainichi pulls out the duct tape and starts passing out bubble gum. "Come on people, time to stop existance from unmaking itself."
* BoobiePatutti ties nakid Lucy Lius and that Alias chicks around as sacrifice
* ChiDoll passes out bundles of pixie stix around
[falkin42] what will become of the lost children now?
[Dainichi] good gawd, I think we're...*gasp* Bored.
[BoobiePatutti] LOL
[BoobiePatutti] We're ALWAYS bored.
[Dainichi] too true.
[BoobiePatutti] We simply amuse ourselves with our fingers.
[BoobiePatutti] BY TYPING
[BoobiePatutti] YOU PERVS
[BoobiePatutti] Someone. Fondle me. I am lost.
*** GypsyJr has joined #hobbitporn
*** BoobiePatutti sets mode: +o GypsyJr
[falkin42] how about beethoven
[BoobiePatutti] God has fallen! Help us find God Gypsy!!
[GypsyJr] GypsyJr427: [BoobiePatutti] God has fallen! Help us find God Gypsy!!
[GypsyJr] DrownedWorld2001: i think he's behind the couch
[falkin42] "and in the winter food became scarce, and they were forced to eat Robin's minstrels"
[GypsyJr] "and there was much rejoicing."

[mishastar] does anyone know why farscape is gone?
[trekkittie] its on hiatus in the US
[sundance] On vacation
* sundance suddenly gets an image of Rygel in Disney World
[trekkittie] in leather
[sundance] Hmmm this could be an interesting thought
[trekkittie] except i got him right in front of sleeping beauty's castle at disneyland
[sundance] Yeah...saying "What do you mean there isn't a kitchen in this castle."
* sundance then pictures some kids saying, "Mommy can I get my picture taken with the puppet?" Then Rygel saying, "I'm nobody's puppet."
* sundance then pictures Rygel biting off Mickey's ear and getting thrown out

[Gibby Nibblet] Big Floppy Donkey Dick.. LOL (watching too much south park)

* Gibby Nibblet remembers he had a nightmare when he was a young kid about a sock that tried to kill him

* Lyme struts around being the big manly butch spider-killer. I feel like I could grow balls.
* Ash42 looks at bug, screams like a little girl again, and jumps up on the bar

[PunkOMama©] I HAVE AN ASS OF STEEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[MrDNA] afk, need snack cake
* HyperKinetic makes note. Sara Lee is Spi's bitch

[Dainichi] ....you know what kind of funny? If some odd accident of chance happened and I ended up working as a writer on Farscape, Kemper would probably write about me in his colum.
[Dainichi] "We have a new writer. She's a Scaper, like all of you, which means I'm deathly afraid that one day during a meeting she's going to jump across the table and jam a pen into my larynx."
[Dainichi] There would be much shouting of "You tracer!" "YER MOTHERS A TRACER!"
[Dainichi] And many photos of the actors on days they have to do wire work.
[Dainichi] "Hey, Ben! Look down! Smile! Say, 'This one's for the ladies, because you can see my bum!'"

[Caligula] Its like when your are 5 years old and watching Lost in Space...you know Dr Smith is a Pedophile but you are too young to know what that is..you just know something is horribly wrong
[Caligula] "Williaaaammm!! Come back here dear boy and we will explore the Rings of Youranus together yeewwwwww!"
[Caligula] Q: Are we not men?
[MrDNA] A: We Are Devo!
[Ka`Leo] A: we are DEVO
[DrSandor] A: We are Devo
[DrSandor] hat trick mind meld!

from a convo on AIM:
Pink Punkerz: I'm sorry, I got off crack, I made this quiz thingy and your icon is *almost* done
Pink Punkerz: crack!?
Pink Punkerz: track*

aaaaand back to #farscape!
[Dawg] hmmmmm and her I thought cave check was a female version of the package check

* justRed-dammit pokes hyper..
* HyperKinetic peeks in
[justRed-dammit] *snickersnort*.. i set off his highlights.. GO ME!!
* HyperKinetic sekop Red
[HyperKinetic] GO YOU!! (Wow, you're really high huh?) ;)
[justRed-dammit] you did it to me from behind? wowwwww...
* justRed-dammit falls down laughing
* HyperKinetic wonders where that comment came from and starts to laugh along with Red
[justRed-dammit] *ahem* hyper.. you said "sekop".. which is "pokes" backwards.. hence, my comment.. made perfect sense to me!

[mathmikey] This is the first chat room where people are not doing strange things.
[Pau] oh we do strange things
[Mote] You just havent been here long enough

[Dainichi] But...penises are fun!

GypsyJr427: and in years to come I'm going to look back on this and wonder whay I have the phrase "pantsless anarchy" written in my notebook
PKDainichi: Of course, I was pretty young when those episodes first aired.
PKDainichi: Yes, Gyps, but then you'll remember, and you'll teach your children, and they'll teach their children, and one will grow up to be president, and on his inaguration day, he'll yell "PANTSLESS ANARCHY!" and take off his pants
PKDainichi: On live television.

[Lyme] I need humidity
[Lyme] I'm a fruit
[Lyme] I need tropical climates, bizzatch
[justRed-dammit] i don't think you'll see anyone arguing that point, lyme
* ChiDoll puts Lymey in her pants and takes her to Hawaii
[Lyme] I'm ridin in your pants to hawaii
[Lyme] that sounds like it could make a good country song
[Lyme] Starring Stifler and Kelso.
* ChiDoll marries Lyme and Dani in Hawaii. *cackle*
[Lyme] wait, we have to go to mormon country for all three of us to get hitched
[Lyme] I rode in yer pants all the way to hawaii
[Lyme] It was so hot down there I thought I would die-eeee
[Lyme] We got hitched there
[Lyme] At the county fair
[Lyme] I rode in yer pants all the way to hawaii...
[Lyme] Well in hawaii they got a volcano
[Lyme] and in hawaii I can call you a dirty ho
[Lyme] Cause I rode in yer pants all the way to hawaii
[Lyme] Oh, my dear, you look just like something Kawaii
[Lyme] Well down in hawaii we both got lei'd...
[Lyme] And when we were done we weren't ever paid
[Lyme] Cause them bastards are cheap
[Lyme] With not bennies to reap
[Lyme] oh, I rode in your pants all the way to hawaii
[Lyme] Well I'm gonna ride out of hawaii still in your pants
[Lyme] Oh baby I hope you'll just give me one more chance
[Lyme] Cause I rode in your pants all the way to hawaii.
[Lyme] Thank you, thank you very much.
[Lyme] Hawaii is too goddamn hard to rhyme.
[Lyme] I married a gorilla in old amarilla!
[Lyme] She was purty and had lips like a young boy
[Lyme] Well that gorilla, she wasn't too nice
[Lyme] She used me like I was some old sex toy
[Lyme] That gorilla, I tell you, she was into vice

* Dainichi is gonna head off. Gonna talk on the porno.
[Dainichi] Er. Phone.
[Dainichi] I swear to god, I ment phone...

[Dainichi] Semen. Which makes me think really bad things about the Navy.
[HyperKinetic] Point is, it tastes bad. No point in having the other person swallow it... (Not that I'd know or, oh man...)
[Dainichi] Tastes like really bitter coffee.
[Dainichi] Er, not that I know.
[ilovechickwithgun] HK, it is not the taste, it knowing it came from you... er I mean... well,, in the heat of the moment, even in het sex, one can accidentally cum in contact with one's own ... er you know like I didn't try to but it got on my, and her... and then I ... well, anyway it didn't taste that bad.. not that I tried to taste it or anything you know, it was just that... oh frell it.
[trekkittie] mmmm sounds like a band conversation
[AL] What the frell?
[Dainichi] We're headed down "Kinky Boulvarde" by way of "Man Juice Lane".

[skexy] use higher SPF monkey jizm.......

[ilovechickwithgun] DAINI gets the cunnilingus award!

[HyperKinetic] Like circle jerks
[ilovechickwithgun] HK! youpromised you wouldn't tell!
[Dainichi] Geez, what did y'all get up to at SC?

[Grizz] no wonder anakin changed his name. "Darth Fartnocker" just doen't instill fear in the lowly masses

[JICsnerk] so if PHF gets a hobbit can I have an orc
[Lyme] What would you want with an orc?
[Lyme] Not koodle-boppy, I hope
[Quasadu] orc koodle boppy?
[ChiDoll] koodle-boppy with an orc. ewwww.
[Dainichi] Koodle-boppy with an orc. OW.
[Grizz] an orc? goodness gracious!
[Lyme] It would be more gooey than godsnot
[Quasadu] but not as citrusy
[Lyme] but prolly just as green

[Lyme] D'Argo is the shaft of the UT
[Lyme] It's his duty to please that booty
[Dainichi] He's a bad mutha- SHUT YO MOUTH! I'm just talkin bout D'Argo, baby. We can dig it.
[Lyme] I wonder what the evolution behind the luxan love tongue was
* Dainichi is now seeing Mulder in the vampire trailer park episode of X-Files, lying on the floor singing the Shaft theme.

[Mote] to complete the french label I think you have to go without a bath for 3 days and grow out all your body hair. God I wish I hadnt just thought about french woman... ewww...

[Digitabulum] everybody likes mom when they meat her

[justRed-dammit] ROFLMAO LYME!! i did the same thing a while ago.. only i added this little skippity thing cuz i was on my way over to my 'puter.. i looked like drop dead fred on acid...

[Lyme] Scratch N Sniff = Scapercon in the UTs

[HyperKinetic] Oy Vay. AI stunk
* Mnementh pees on Hyper's foot...
* HyperKinetic has Mne arrested for wizzing in a public spot
* Mnementh pees on the arresting officer...
* Teefa wonders if cuffs would work on a dragon Mnementh's size
[Mnementh] What the frell you gonna DO ? I'm a dragon ya little twinkie... Go harrass a donut... ;)

[Lyme] I could sooooo make a joke about plumber's cleavage right now
[Dainichi] Well, you can't really see the plumber's cleavage when the plumber is wearing assless pants.

[Dainichi] "Whats a nubian"
[MrDNA] "bitch, you almost made me laugh!"
[Lyme] "Bitch, you almost made me laugh'
[HyperKinetic] Sexy nubian goddess, mhmmm
[talyn] i've seen hyper and he is definitely not a nubian goddess
[HyperKinetic] I am too!
[Dainichi] "You didn't tell me you were going to do the black rage thing! I nearl pissed myself!"
[HyperKinetic] Now put your collar back on!
[MrDNA] HK's one ugly senorita, though
[Lyme] talyn, it's a joke... you know, like you being straight would be a joke
[talyn] lyme, no me being straight would be a nightmare
[Dainichi] Aww, come on now talyn, it wouldn't be that bad...
[Lyme] the day talyn's straight, I'm girly, and hyper is a sexy nubian goddess is the day I convert to Southern Baptist
[Dainichi] You on top of some girl you barely know, pounding away, not noticing that bored look in her eyes...
[Dainichi] ...I...sense I've gone too far.
[Lyme] "Hey, I *always* notice that bored look in her eyes"
[HyperKinetic] I AM A NUBIAN GODDESS DAMNIT!!!
[HyperKinetic] Oh wait, add "Sexy" to that
[Dainichi] Hyper...you're not allowed to call yourself a goddess. It's just...disturbing.
* Dainichi steals the "dess" out of Hyper's sentance. I could careless abou- O_o

[Lyme] Hyper, I have SEEN the stuff Dani can do!
[Lyme] I was SCAIRT!
[Lyme] You will be wettin yourself

* HyperKinetic cuts open a pig and suffocates B by sticking his head in the opening
[MrDNA] always knew HK wanted to pork B3...

* Mnementh suggests we all move to Utah, start a monstrous Scaper commune... We can take over from the Mormons...

[VampsterDoodle] I'm jealous, I wish *I* had a clitoris
* VampsterDoodle yells at his penis for being flacid and saggy
[VampsterDoodle] I've begged the SOB before
[VampsterDoodle] 'please play for daddy'

[Lyme] JEnnifer Garner is SO FEKKING HOT
[chickwithtofu] lyme is at attention
[Lyme] I am having hot crazy wet sticky monkey sex with her one day

* GypsyJr camps out outside Chi's webpage with a sign reading "Give us a QL update!" ;)

[HyperKinetic] I wouldn't mind a good spanking. My butt can handle it, trust me
[Ka`Leo] BTW, anyone who owns a whip and is going to ScaperCon...BRING IT!! LOL
[DivaWantsAnIrishman] Hyper= J Lo?
[HyperKinetic] I have a larger than average butt, yes
[DivaWantsAnIrishman] More cushion for the pushin baby

[FarDareisMai] Anyone know the difference between Kinky and Perveted?
[Spiral5] far, kinky is using a feather. perverted is using the whole duck
[ChiDoll] kinky is using the feather... perverted is using the.... dammit
[LeCygne] Kinky is when you use the feathers; perverted is when you use the whole chicken.
[DivaWantsAnIrishman] Kinky is usung wax... Perverted is using the whole candle...
[Mote] Kinky is Aeryn in a nurse outfit... perverted is Rygel in S&M gear

[DaniOBoobie] Hi! We're Americans. We like to have drunk and have sex. Got a holiday for us to drink to?

[Mote] If My M&M talked, Id be seeking immediate professional help

[bejeesus] And the Survey Says: Who would when in a gang fight: Star Trek fans or Star Wars fans?
[Lyme] The Scapers would get drunk and kick all their asses
[Lyme] We're the soccer hooligans of SciFi

[nineball30121] how old is every one in here?
[Ash42] physically or mentally?

* VampsterDoodle squeals like a small child and wets himself as loki beats him with a small floppy thing, possibly a fish, possibly a marshmallow he's just not sure....

[ChiDoll ] wise man say: never play leap-frog with a unicorn
[Ken-from-Chicago] never play leapfrog with a horse--or a convict
[HyperKinetic] Confucius say: He who laughs last did not get joke
[ChiDoll ] Confucius say: He who farts in church must sit in own pew
[TIL] Confucius say: Man who sleeps with dick in wallet will come into money :)

[Lyme] TIME FOR TITS!
[Lyme] eR
[Lyme] I mean... TIME FOR TITUS!